Is Sympathetic Pregnancy a real thing? 🤨

Hi, this is Dan from Dad Psych.

Every Wednesday, we deliver an informative newsletter backed by psychological insights, designed for soon-to-be and new dads.

Here’s what’s on the menu today:

• 🤔 New Dads- Ever heard of Couvade Syndrome?

• 👀 What is ‘The Look’ from other dads?

• 🧏‍♂️ We want to hear from you!  

• 🤷‍♂️ Sometimes, you’ve just gotta “man up”

New Dads- Ever heard of Couvade Syndrome?

Recently, i’ve been binge-watching House on Netflix. If you like scaring the crap out of yourself from a medical standpoint then certainly get involved.

(You either have the common cold or amazon rainforest disease.)

Anyways, in one episode, the main doctor, House, encounters a male patient who hasn't slept in weeks, has stoothache, headache and stomach issues.

House asks him if he's married and when she's due.

Confused, the patient asks how he knew about her pregnancy and House informs him that he has Couvade Syndrome and that “he needs to stop complaining”.

So what exactly is Couvade Syndrome?

Couvade syndrome, or sympathetic pregnancy, is a condition where men experience pregnancy-like symptoms when their partner is pregnant. These symptoms are psychological but manifest physically.

Symptoms include:

• Nausea

• Abdominal pain

• Back pain

• Weight gain

• Mood swings

• Fatigue

• Insomnia

• Food cravings or aversions

The science behind Couvade Syndrome

The reason behind Couvade Syndrome is a bit of a mystery but it’s probably a mix of psychology, hormones, and just being super in sync with your partner.

How common is Couvade Syndrome?

More common than you might think. According to research it’s, strangely enough, based on culture and differs across countries.

For example, a study in Australia found that 31% of men experience the condition, while in the United Kingdom, the rate is 25%. In Poland, the majority of expectant fathers (72%) report experiencing at least one symptom of Couvade Syndrome during their partner's pregnancy.

This difference is probably down to the culture of men in that particular country. For example, if they’re less likely to go to the docs for their ailments, they’re less likely to be a statistic for Couvade Syndrome.

Is Couvade Syndrome 'worth complaining about'?

Well, if you do have Couvade Syndrome, you’re not in any immediate danger, but if you’re randomly feeling nauseous, bloated, or overly emotional for no apparent reason, it can definitely be frustrating.

Sure, the symptoms aren’t going to send you to the hospital, but they’re annoying enough to make you wonder what’s going on with your body.

Once you get that it's probably your brain and body just being overly empathetic (and maybe a little hormonal), it helps make sense of the craziness.

So yeah, while it’s probably not worth a doctors visit, knowing it’s a thing can definitely help you deal with the weirdness.

What is ‘The Look’ from other dads?

According to writer Tom Lamont, The Look is the universal expression parents exchange, like a secret handshake.

He states that if you’ve ever been out in public wrangling a tiny human, you’ve received it. You can’t describe it, but you know you’ve had it.

Apparently, it’s that mix of nostalgia, relief, and just a hint of smugness from other dads that says, "I see you in the trenches, but I’m over here enjoying coffee in peace."

Other seasoned veterans pass The Look on, especially to frazzled new dads.

It’s part sympathy, part "hang in there, pal" and part mourning for those cute but chaos-fueled baby years that slipped away.

Tom states that you’ll certainly be giving The Look too, once you climb the ranks to ‘veteran dad'.

We want to hear from you! 🧏‍♂️

• Veteran Dad?

• Newbie but have some fantastic stories to share?

We’re just getting started here at Dad Psych, so we’d love to hear your new Dad stories. No matter what the topic is, we want to hear it!

Reply to this email with your chance to feature in our next newsletter!

Sometimes, you’ve just gotta “man up”

“Man up”.

It’s a phrase that’s gotten a lot of slack recently, and for good reason, too. You can’t just get over a deep, emotional problem by telling someone to “man up”. It doesn’t work, nor is it useful. “Ah yeah, you know your depression, mate? Just man up and stop feeling that way.”

😑

But, if we’re being honest here, there are times when you’ve just got to remind yourself to “man up”, and becoming a new or expecting dad is definitely one of them.

No matter how tough things get, you’ve got to be there for your family and your child—it's just a non-negotiable part of the deal.

But, if it ever feels like too much, there's no shame in reaching out for help. Taking care of your mental health doesn’t make you any less of a man, in fact, it means you’re making sure you’re there for your family in the best way you can be.

Stoic Father’s tweet really nails the whole manning up situation and lays out some great advice that will help with your mental health, too.

That’s about it for now, have a great week.

- Dan from Dad Psych

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