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What Is 'Nesting' and Do Dads Do It?

You’ve just reorganized the garage for the second time this week or started hitting the gym like you’re prepping for a superhero movie. Sound familiar? You might be nesting.

You’ve just reorganized the garage for the second time this week or started hitting the gym like you’re prepping for a superhero movie. Sound familiar? You might be nesting.

While nesting is often linked to moms-to-be, new dads can experience it too. It’s a natural instinct driven by the urge to create a safe, prepared environment for your growing family.

Not every first-time dad will feel compelled to repaint the nursery or stock up on nappies, but if you’re suddenly obsessed with making life “just right” before your son or daughter arrives, you’re definitely not alone.

Let’s break down why this happens, how to spot it, and what to do if it gets out of hand.

Why Do Dads Nest?

Nesting comes from a mix of psychology and biology. While hormonal shifts in moms-to-be are well known, new fathers can experience changes too. Increased oxytocin (the bonding hormone) and reduced testosterone can trigger protective, home-prepping instincts.

Psychologically, becoming a father is a massive life change. Taking on home projects or even extra work can provide a sense of control amid the unpredictability of parenting. Prepping the home, managing finances, or getting in shape can ease the anxiety of stepping into fatherhood.

Signs You’re Nesting

Not sure if you’re nesting or just unusually productive? Here are some telltale signs that first-time fathers might notice:

1. Cleaning & Organizing: Vacuuming under the sofa “just in case” or arranging the baby’s clothes by size and colour.

2. Stocking Up: Bulk-buying nappies, wipes, or emergency snacks to “get ahead” before the baby’s arrival.

3. DIY Projects: Fixing leaky taps, assembling baby furniture, or even repainting rooms to create a perfect space.

4. Financial Prep: Taking on side gigs or working extra hours to build a financial safety net for your growing family.

5. Fitness Frenzy: Hitting the gym harder than ever, driven by the urge to “protect and provide.”

6. Over-Planning: Mapping hospital routes, creating family schedules, and having contingency plans for every baby-related scenario.

When Nesting Becomes Too Much

While nesting is helpful, it can spiral into overdrive. If repainting the fence or taking extra shifts keeps you away from your partner or affects your work-life balance, it’s time to reassess.

Ask yourself: “Am I doing this because it’s necessary or because I’m avoiding my feelings about becoming a dad?”

Nesting Tips for Dads

Prioritise What Matters: Focus on essential tasks and save the “nice-to-haves” for later.

Check In with Your Partner: Make sure your nesting habits are supportive, not isolating.

Set Time Limits: Dedicate specific times to tasks so nesting doesn’t consume your weekends.

Make It Meaningful: Choose emotionally valuable projects, like assembling the crib together or creating a family photo wall.

Nesting is nature’s way of helping first-time fathers prepare for parenting. Embrace the urge, but remember: building a home filled with love matters more than chasing perfection.

For more fatherhood insights, subscribe to our New Dad Newsletter—your go-to fatherhood blog for navigating life as a dad.

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